Oct 18, 2022·edited Oct 18, 2022Liked by Mikala Jamison
I agree with everything you've said here. I think the trouble is that a large percentage of men do not, in fact, know how to shoot their shot in an appropriate way. (Basically anywhere, including at the gym.) The "Can you flirt at the gym?" discussion actually kind of misses the point. The larger societal problem is men feeling entitled to women's time, attention, and energy, at all hours of the day, wherever they are. It's understandably exhausting for women, and it ruins it for the men who CAN flirt and take the L well (without acting like a petulant child). Instead of talking about whether or not it's "allowed" (as though that's a behavior that gym employees are going to police), I'd rather Fitstagram actually looked at the problem head-on, and had a conversation about how men can stop being creepy and entitled. You can see this in the comments on JoeySwoll's post: lots of men saying the woman posted the interaction for "likes/attention," and even Joey himself said he "wouldn't have posted the interaction." (Not to rag on Joey, as he seems like a decent person.) But she didn't even post the guy's face! Again, the entitlement: a woman posts something highlighting bad behavior from men, and the response is this weird, "Is this behavior allowed??" question from men, with little to no acknowledgment that this issue is a symptom of a massive problem that affects women everywhere, every day, in and out of the gym.
Good points. I think there are some men who feel entitled to women's time/attention/energy, and some (actual good guys) who are just trying to figure out how to talk to women/date/find a partner without being idiotic or offensive.
Bring back flirting!!!! I love how specific you got here and totally agree with all your points and suggestions. My over-simplified take is that it comes down to just being friendly, casual, and unobtrusive. My favorite “pickup lines” have always just been some version of, hey I think the thing you’re doing is cool, wanna tell me more about it?
I agree with everything you've said here. I think the trouble is that a large percentage of men do not, in fact, know how to shoot their shot in an appropriate way. (Basically anywhere, including at the gym.) The "Can you flirt at the gym?" discussion actually kind of misses the point. The larger societal problem is men feeling entitled to women's time, attention, and energy, at all hours of the day, wherever they are. It's understandably exhausting for women, and it ruins it for the men who CAN flirt and take the L well (without acting like a petulant child). Instead of talking about whether or not it's "allowed" (as though that's a behavior that gym employees are going to police), I'd rather Fitstagram actually looked at the problem head-on, and had a conversation about how men can stop being creepy and entitled. You can see this in the comments on JoeySwoll's post: lots of men saying the woman posted the interaction for "likes/attention," and even Joey himself said he "wouldn't have posted the interaction." (Not to rag on Joey, as he seems like a decent person.) But she didn't even post the guy's face! Again, the entitlement: a woman posts something highlighting bad behavior from men, and the response is this weird, "Is this behavior allowed??" question from men, with little to no acknowledgment that this issue is a symptom of a massive problem that affects women everywhere, every day, in and out of the gym.
Good points. I think there are some men who feel entitled to women's time/attention/energy, and some (actual good guys) who are just trying to figure out how to talk to women/date/find a partner without being idiotic or offensive.
The caveats all boil down to people being normal, so it ain't happening!
lol too true!
Bring back flirting!!!! I love how specific you got here and totally agree with all your points and suggestions. My over-simplified take is that it comes down to just being friendly, casual, and unobtrusive. My favorite “pickup lines” have always just been some version of, hey I think the thing you’re doing is cool, wanna tell me more about it?